Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Burning

As I tear pages out of the black covered journals that have been sitting in boxes for more the thirty year … I throw then into the fire.

All memories reside in some physical object as well as in you mind or at least that’s what the Starman would say. He called all objects “media.”

SuperJoel was a firm believer that burning pictures, journals and clothing was a magic spell that helps one move on. You lose all the pleasure of holding on but you lose some of the pain. ‘Walking backwards into the future’ was how I described facing the past.

I think it’s an archetypal fear that your past will come back to haunt you. At the same time I think people are driven to know what happened to friends from the past. There is a natural haunting of memories; a sweet missing link … sorry for ironic Internet pun. But that is the point of the web; it can never fulfill emotional needs or allow for the truth to be felt.

By posting about the past I was hoping for a response and fearing a response at the same time.

Annelise and Fran, thank you for your comments. Thank you for showing me I still care.




3 Comments:

At 10:46 AM, Blogger Fran said...

I am so enjoying your blog, not just as relates to Joel, but all of it. I'm very grateful for your memories and that you so generously share them. I'm hoping you've done away with the pain and just enjoy what's left not burning.
I'm very glad you still care and glad as well that we've become acquainted by your caring.
love fran

 
At 1:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

There is a natural haunting of memories; a sweet missing link … sorry for ironic Internet pun. But that is the point of the web; it can never fulfill emotional needs or allow for the truth to be felt.


AMEN

 
At 4:58 AM, Blogger JC Haywire said...

Just learning about Super Joel--putting together the pieces of an amazing puzzle. Starman, Iowa, Berkeley, and now, "media." Your blog is enriching my experience. Thanks.

 

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